Relapse and Recovery

I am neither ashamed nor unwilling to acknowledge at this time, that I have recently experienced an acute reocurrence of my established diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder, and associated suicidal ideation, which has led me to be currently being an inpatient member of a Bozeman, MT, mental health treatment center, The Hope House. Hope House is operated by the the Gallatin County Mental Health Center, where I have been recieving out patient therapy for the past 5 months.

 

Serious mental illness, including my own, is a very real thing; and in spite of reasonable quality out pateint care, including prescribed psychiatric medication, it is not uncommon for persons affected as such to experience such relapse(s). In my own case, prior to to my 21 full months of inpatient care in the state of Arizona (including my time in The Arizona State Hospital), the likehood is very high that I would have made an attempt to commit suicide. But I have by now learned to seek help- largely as a consequence of my initial 8 months of treatment in the Tucson area University of Arizona's mental center (formerly known as Kino Hospital), versus the grossly inept practices at ASH- and as such, did seek the asssistance and resources before allowing my recent emotional break lead to an intentional attempt at suicide.

 

That said, my deepest thanks to the good doctors at Kino Hospital, for teaching me that my illness is managable, with the additional heartfelt advice that I do seek help when in crisis, as I am at this time. All told, I am doing well, and the staff resources available here at Hope House are providing very high quality care that I am confident will get me through this current medical crisis. It is likely that my stay here will last no more than 4-6 days (today is my first, after a late night arrival last evening), at which point, I will return to my home here in the Bozeman area, and resume my normal life activities, as they have stood since my Feb. 2012 discharge from the state of Arizona's sole long term public mental hospital, ASH; which as I have made clear in this blog since its inception in April, 2012, was and is still operating in gross violation of established medical-mental health practices.

 

So do not for one moment take for granted that my willingness to continue exposing you Rat Bastards has in any way been compromised.  I am quite certain that you all are happy to learn of my current situation, but I assure you, Noriega, Nelson, Rudd, Humble, etc., that I am going nowhere in terms of my advocacy work on behalf of the ASH community. And your time is still coming, trust me.

 

In closing, spending inpatient time in close quarters with persons affected as I am by serious mental illness has greatly reminded me of my former patient peers at ASH. I am thus compelled to express my best wishes to each and every one of you folks. I sincerely miss many of you (many, but not all...), and as always,we are in this together,in spite of the distance between as at this time. I will never foget or otherwise abandon you. You are my sole source of inspiration today.

 

paoloreed@gmailcom